Tribute to Angie

Dearest Relatives and friends,

On behalf of Angie’s mother, Angie’s siblings, Miaw and Casey, my 3 beautiful children; Ysabel, Lucas and Julia, I would like to thank all of you for coming and bidding farewell to my beloved wife, Angie.

I would also like to thank my dearest friends, Arthur, Mike, Steven and Desmond who accompanied me during the nights at Angie’s wake. Thanks for always being there for me.

To Maria, Richard and Catherine, you will always have a special place in our hearts.

Most of all, I would like to thank Angie’s closest friends, the special group of mommies who help carry out Angie’s funeral plan meticulously, making the celebration of Angie’s life, a truly memorable one. In no particular order, I would like to thank Cat, Cara, Gladys, Grace, June, Lani, Lenny, Phoebe, Sharon, Sophia for your graciousness, your generosity, your unconditional friendship and love.

Angie’s fight with cancer started 3 years ago in March 06 and deteriorated greatly on 19th March this year. During that time, the cancer in her breast had spread to her bones, her lung and her liver. Worse still, the cancer cells had gone to the blood stream and were causing her blood to clot within her. Angie was not expected to live past the week. With God’s mercy and grace, Angie fought hard and eventually checked out of the hospital 14 days later on the 3rd of April. However, by then Angie’s condition was not any better, her liver was not functioning well, her skin was turning yellow from jaundice, her legs had swelled, making it very difficult for her to walk and she was still on chemotherapy via a portable pump, she had to carry on her in a sling .

I remember very clearly, how after a visit to the doctor on the 9th of April, she felt like eating rojak and we went to Old Airport Road for their famous rojak. After eating, I asked how the rojak was and she replied it was ok and that she would like to make one with a different style.

The next day, we went to the Tampines market where she shopped for all the groceries she needed for the rojak. And promptly made them in the same afternoon for tea. Needless to say, it was great. This was followed up 2 days later, this time it was Indian rojak, probably since the hawker stall in Geylang Serai was closed.

All these were done despite her inability to walk normally and the endless discerning stares from passer-bys. She was undaunted by these and persevered with dignity and poise, wanting to live life to the fullest and seizing every moment.

The funeral arrangements were planned by Angie, with help from the special group of people I mentioned earlier; from the dress she wore to the colour of the coffin, the lipstick, the obituary in the papers, for gospel music to be played throughout, etc. to the green memorial book she left for our 3 beautiful children, which also included space where you, her friends could also pen words down.

I was somewhat disturbed when she planned to have a meeting with her friends on the 5th of April regarding the funeral arrangements. Here we were, praying every day for God’s mercy and grace of healing while there she was planning her funeral. I voiced my concerns to her initially but a day later, it dawned on me that “talking or planning about one’s death doesn’t mean you’re going to die”, I just wished that the timing could be a little better. But we both agreed that after the planning was done, the funeral arrangements would be kept in storage, and that we would continue to ask for God’s mercy and grace.

My Darling Angie, Your strength to fight cancer and live through it as though it was something mundane is nothing short of extraordinary.

Your courage to plan and prepare for your own funeral, to write farewell letters to each of your children not forgetting all of us, speaks volumes of a person filled with wisdom and understanding.

Despite all your afflictions, your joy for life showed whenever you smiled and in the boundless energy that you possess.

We will always feel cheated that you were taken from us at so young an age and yet we must be grateful that you came along at all. Now that you are gone, we can truly appreciate what we are now without, and we want you to know that life without you is so very, very difficult. But the strength that you possess, have inspired us with the strength to move forward.

I am so fortunate and blessed to have you for my wife and thank you for giving me the privilege and honour to be your husband. My exceptional and irreplaceable Angie, whose beauty is both internal and external, will never be forgotten.

Yours forever,
Rem

Angie left to be with Jesus

Sadly, Angie left us on 30th April to be with the Lord. She was very peaceful and before she walked with Jesus, she left a note for all of us:

Angie’s last note to all..

The true meaning of life to me is very simple; never look back, treasure the present and not seek the future.

Life can be very unpredictable, it can be short or it may last you forever but nevertheless I have travelled the world and lived a life filled with lots of love, laughter and sweet memories. Most importantly I am very blessed to have Remigius who is my pillar of strength and support in a marriage which lasted half my lifetime. Ysabel, Lucas and Julia are my most blessed treasure of which is hardest to let go.

The last three years of my battle with Cancer had been hard fought but I have never let it destroy my life, instead I’ve learned to live a day at a time, never taking anything for granted and loving the day ahead.

There were times when I had little time for you, my friends, especially during my last few months and that’s because I was too weak and most of the time ,in pain.

As I journey into my eternal life with God, I would like to say a big Thank you to all who have given me your love and friendship, especially those who stood by me all along and showed kindness, help, and encouragement in the smallest of ways.

To my dearest dedicated nine mummies, you are beyond words for all that you have done for me all these wonderful years. Your thoughts and support were always endless towards me. You have given me lots of sweet memories and everlasting love for which I truly appreciate.

My life partner, I have honored our marriage vows. It’s alright to miss me, be strong and then release me peacefully.

And finally to all of you, remember, you have lost only one of me but sadly I have lost so many of you.

So till we meet again one day in God’s house, I bid you farewell and leave you now with these words:

“Perhaps my time seemed all too brief Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief. Lift up your hearts and peace to thee God wanted me now; He set me free”

A Singaporean

Waking up early on 13 November 08 seems like just another day, but the truth of a matter is it is a big day for me..

I was on time for my appointment at 0845 and it seems forever when you are waiting for a queue number to be called. There is a crowd of about 50 waiting with many children looking restless. In addition to the rainy day the air cond is freezing cold. Rem and I were hungry too...sigh

Finally after 3 hours of waiting I was called in to the Justice of Oath. The judge seems like a friendly lady giving us lots of insights to passport application and the official swearing in ceremony. Rem all smiles when the judge asked me to raise my left arm to read my oath, I read it out loud and clear. She then declared me a Singapore Citizen and handed me my temporary IC.

We headed to Raffles City for lunch at Soup Spoon cafe. It was a good meal in a crowded place packed with lunch crowd. I was so sleepy all I did was asked to go home but Rem insisted that to celebrate my new status we should spend the afternoon in Orchard. We walked a few good hours at Tangs and Duty Free window shopping.

Then as we were heading back to our car at Goodwood Pk hotel, Rem insisted that we have tea before heading home. Tired I reluctantly agreed.

We walked in the the cafe then I noticed Marc and some of my girlfriends, first thing that came to my mind was..hey how come my friends are out here without me?? They all came hugging and wishing me..took a while before I realised that the high tea was set up for me by my dear husband. Ever so thoughtful I said to my friends.

To summarise all, on the first day of my new status I got to spent it with my family and my good friends. Mum was so touched that she shed a few tears.

A Journey Begins..

37 years ago I was born in Selangor, Malaysia. Sister Miaw and brother Casey are my other two siblings, we have a big age gap of 8 and 6 years and I have always been the "pest" to them but nevertheless we grew closer when we got older. Mum was always busy with the hair salon. Dad passed away when I was 9 years old of a heart attack. I remember very little of him.

Primary school was a breeze. Secondary years was full of fun and laughter. Many moments I treasured. There were plenty of boys but I was a late starter, met my first boyfriend at the age of 15. Deryl was a lovely guy with a wonderful family. We had a 5 years courtship.

To summarize my growing up years..I have had a very independent, care free childhood with lots of values and virtues.

At the age of 19 in 1990, I landed a job as a stewardess with SIA and never looked back since. Flying was one of the best years of my life, to be exact a good 5 years till 1995. Being away gave me lots of freedom but with the right values I took pride in my body and soul.

About 2 years into my flying career I met Remigius Tan. I was first attracted to his good looks then it took very little time for us to start a relationship in HongKong just 3 days before my 21st Birthday. The rest they say is history.. We said our vows on 5 July 1997 at Blessed Sacrament Church and dinner at Omni Marco Polo hotel. Our honeymoon to Bali was with our close buddies Richard and Catherine.

God blessed us with 3 Bundle of Joy, Ysabel in 1998, Lucas in 2001 and Julia in 2004. Life has never been the same since being a mummy. They change my thoughts and I learned from them daily. Its just fantastic watching them grow day by day.

Apart from being a wife and a mother I have had to work full time in early part of Ysabel's life. I was managing a service office in Raffles Place for a few years till I had Lucas. Life was tedious juggling with kids and career, I chose to spend time at home.

Looking after Ysabel, Lucas and my other big baby Rem on my own was no easy task but end of the day I am happy. There were many birthday parties to attend and many wonderful outings. We enjoyed our visits to Pasir Ris Park. As our family grew so did our friends. It got so big we had very little room to fit all in our humble home.

We welcome our 3rd and last baby Julia in 2004. She was all I wanted, fair, big eyes and curly hair. Her locks only came at 2 years old and I am still enjoying "curly Ju"

Soon after Julia was old enough I embarked on my career as a realestate agent. I was very blessed with lots of clients and was able to make a decent salary. Its a job that gives me plenty of time to be with my family and I get rewarded quite handsomely.

Life seems happy and smooth sailing..